My father recently lost his IPod. Hon, my father’s been losing stuff since I was a mini-Marylander. Whenever he lost somethin’ there was a lot of hollerin’ and feet stompin’ up and down stairs. The earth actually stopped revolving until the lost object was found which might be the reason we have leap years. The amount of times the world stopped altered the calendar permanently.
When my dad unpacked after visiting this summer, he couldn’t find his IPod. My parents live a few hours away so it was up to me to form the IPod Search Party. Mats in back of a car were lifted, a newspaper pile was rifled through, a bed was stripped and a guestroom scoured, but to no avail. No luck.
I could say that my father loses more stuff than anyone I know but that might be a lie. I haven’t counted how often I lose things but it happens often enough. I seem to be constantly looking for a Very Important Piece of Paper, the Coupon For the Store I’m Going to Now and my cell phone. I bet my kids would say there’s a lot of hollerin’ and foot stompin’ up and down stairs, but I’m not sure the earth has stopped revolving.
Hon, habits are hard to break. And I have a habit of hiding things, then promptly forgetting where I hid them. I guess I should write down where I hide things but then I’d be looking for another Very Important Piece of Paper! I have wasted hours, days and maybe even years searching—sometimes successfully (Oh yeah—that’s where I put it!) and sometimes not (where in the heck could it be?). To help me in my hunt I say, “If I were me, where would I put it?” I have to channel myself!
Ironically, I am currently on the case of an Equally Important Envelope. I feel queasy and have a headache from racking my brain trying to go backwards in time to the moment I put the E.I.E. down. Where in the heck could it be?
After several days, the IPod Search Party was called off. My dad called to say his IPod turned up. Apparently, when he unpacked from his visit, he didn’t notice that his IPod fell out of a shirt pocket and landed in his fishing boot! It would have stayed there but, lucky him, while packing for a fishing trip his IPod fell out of the boot.
Maybe I should look in a fishing boot for that Envelope. Oh yeah—I don’t fish.
If you ever lost somethin’ and then found it in an unexpected place, please share—it’ll make me feel better!